Laziest Peon #6 – Arazzius the Cruel

Welcome back to the Laziest Peon, a series of articles where we explore the relationships between common and uncommon cards from the WoW TCG with their counter-parts in the MMO. You may have noticed that the card for this week, Arazzius the Cruel is rare. I havent already run out of interesting commons and uncommons, but this card I couldnt pass up as it represents a lovely slice of conversion pie.

Arazzius is the culmination of two quests chains; one for Horde (Cruel’s Intentions), one for Alliance (Overlord). The Horde one is LONG, something like 10 quests in all. The Alliance get it slightly easier, with their quest to kill Arazzius coming more quickly. Incidentally the flavour text comes from the Alliance quest giver. Arazzius is a decent enough card, a 4/4 for 4 is solid. Like all demons, however, he strikes a bargain in order to allow you to work with him. If he attacks, both sides are losing something. In the MMO Arazzius is a group quest, and you really need a tank and a healer because this bugger hits HARD. It is suggested that you need 3 people, I would suggest you bring more than that.

But, contrary to his ego, Arazzius is not the reason we’re here today. For both sides the death of Arazzius allows the user to pick trinket from Bladefist’s Breadth, Vengeance of the Illidari, and Regal Protectorate. Its unfortunate that only 2 of the3 trinkets were available in the March of the Legion expansion. Bladefist’s Breadth is obviously a melee tool; its MMO text reads “Equip: Improves critical strike rating by 26. Use: Increases attack power by 200 for 15 sec. (1.5 Min Cooldown)”. That’s a pretty nice buff in anyone’s books. Venegeance of the Illidari is a mirror image for spellcasters “Equip: Improves spell critical strike rating by 26. Use: Increases spell damage done by up to 120 and healing done by up to 220 for 15 sec. (1.5 Min Cooldown)”. I like that symmetry, and I think its due to that symmetry that the Regal Protectorate was left out of the TCG Lets have a look at the TCG versions though, and see what stacks up.

Bladefist’s Breadth is a 3-cost trinket available to everyone but Mage, Priest and Warlock. Makes sense, the MMO trinket boosts melee crit, which isnt much use to a spellflinger. Its text reads “When you play a weapon, ready your hero”. Doesnt look like a bonus to critical strike rating, does it? But lets look at what a bonus to a critical strike rating means in the MMO. At a basic level whenever your attack causes a critical it will do substantially more damage (around 150%). Increasing your critical strike rating increases the chance that your attack will critical. That brings us back to the TCG card, where the most obvious use of the trinket is to attack, play a second weapon (and either keep it if you have dual wield, or pitch the exhausted one if you dont), ready your hero, and attack again. In effect, its like you’ve just caused a critical.

Vengeance of the Illidari is a 5-cost trinket that is open to everyone but Hunter, Rogue and Warrior. Its text reads “When you play an ability, ready your hero.” Why do these three classes miss out on being able to wield this gem? Within the TCG they are the three classes most likely to dual wield (see the Dual Wield ability). But, the TCG has forgotten something; Shamans can also dual wield. Weapons like Axe of the Legion, Timeslicer and Warp Splinter’s Thorn mean that they are just as likely to swing like mad. But back to spellcasters, the intended target for Vengeance in the MMO. How much do Cat-form Druid’s love this card? All they do is play abilities and swing claws at heads (sure, you’re usually dead by turn 5, but it might just be worth it). What about the Mage, Priest and Warlock?  March of the Legion gave them access to Devil-Stitched Leggings, leggings that can kill 3-health or smaller allies for the price of 3-resources and an exhaust. With Vengeance out and in the mid to late game the leggings could potentially reduce a Hero’s health by 6 – which is a significant swing in health and should mean game. This is balanced by the cost of the trinket, at 5-resources, its flat out expensive. Those resources could be better spent on direct damage, destruction or an ally.

There is one final point to make about the relationship between Arazzius, his reward trinkets, and the TCG. The MMO only allows for a character to pick one of the 3 trinkets available. The TCG allows for classes that can use both trinkets to do so. I’m sure there are plenty of other weapons and abilities that can exploit a ready hero, and with Servants of the Betrayer out shortly, no doubt that list will grow. There needs to be more ways in which a Hero can be useful outside of combat, especially for squishies.

Laziest Peon #5 – ACT Regionals

The name’s Forang Deathrattle. Well, it wasnt always Deathrattle, you understand, that’s just something I added to make myself sound more dangerous. Us ‘locks have a certain reputation, and Forang Cuddlywuddly doesnt have the same soul-scaring effect.

Me Da was a soldier in the War and afterwards settled outside of Ratchet, to raise worthless wretch of a son (so he would say). Da said a lot of things like “Steel and thunder before meat and slumber!” – I never understood that, I love to sleep!

At a tender age of 30, Da threw me out of the house, saying he’d gotten me some job working for some guy Foreman Thazz’ril up at the Valley of Trials. I guess he expected that seeing all those young, inspired orcs joining the war machine might get me to do the same. I never liked that job – cutting lumber wasnt for me. So, while the Foreman wasnt watching, I would duck behind a tree and get myself some shut-eye. That is, until some youth would smash me noggin with a bludgeon! Man, I hated that job. So I quit.

I saw an opportunity for some quick, easy cash. Those girlies over at the Burning Blade Coven were forever getting themselves whacked on by the young Horde (apparently they stole the Foreman’s Pick – oooo EVIL). So I started acting as muscle, giving the newbies a hard time. It was a laugh. It helped that they were already scared by Thulthun, he’s one of them Felstalkers that the Burning Blade kept around to cause mischief. When things were quiet we’d play “fetch” with them bludgeoning sticks. One day, the head honcho of those cultists, Yarrog Baneshadow, offers to take me under his ‘wing’ and teach me ‘a few things’ – saying that I could go far in the Coven if I let him ‘help’ me. My weirdo-o-meter goes off the chart (bought from Ratchet) and I graciously decline by smashing my fist into his noggin and scallywag it out of that cave. Besides this speel is coming from a guy who’s been stuck in a cave for the last 5 years! I head back to Ratchet, avoiding Da and taking up with Menara Voidrender, a human, but really good at the whole demon-pact-for-power thing.

Still I guess by that tapping of your fingers you’re bored. Ok, ok I’ll stop rambling but you do know its not wise t’annoy a ‘lock right? We can give you the Pox, you know?

Time passes. Deals are made. Demons are broken. Da is happy, but hanging out in Orgrimmar waiting for something to happen was starting to bore me, so I grabs a couple of mates and head down to Gurubashi in Stranglethorn Vale where I hear some sort of tournament is taking place. Along with Thulthun, I bring Kagella Shadowmark (a brutal, bloodthirsty rogue), Broan Charges-the-Fight (one of the cleverest Tauren out there), Voss Treebender (he’s got his uses, but smells of leaves), and a clansman Bloodsoul. Broan was having lady-problems and was glad to get out of Thunder Bluff and he knew two cousins that work well together (for a price) – Bhenn Checks-the-Sky and Doshura Risestrider. All those Tauren, I hoped it didnt rain, they smell when its wet. Somehow, Magister Ashi joined the group – stealthy sod, but he got on well and looked to be helpful.

I wasnt sure how’d we fair, as I hadnt really bothered to learn some of the earth shattering gifts of my tradecraft, nor had I been to any of Onyxia’s Lair, Molten Core or Magtheridon’s Lair. Still, it would be an interesting trip, Bloodsoul is funny as hell when he drinks, and as my Da used to say “Fear is for the enemy.” So we signed up and waited for our names to be called.

First Round: Dizdemona

A fellow warlock, nice! Sure she’s Alliance, but she’s so darn cute. First battle, the demonic cutey placed an Unstable Affliction on me – I think it was something I said – and tried to follow it with a Curse of Agony. I saw that coming (Eye of Kilrogg) and nixed it. Poor Thulthun was feared and began running in circles, but Kagella and Broan held things together nicely (with Bloodsoul acting like a maniac), and despite a second Unstable Affliction (I didnt even know you could have two at once!) they rushed Dizzy and pummelled her into submission.

I think that really annoyed her, because in the second match she just got NASTY. I hadnt even heard of some of the spells she was hurling. Shred Soul? Jar Soul? How is that fair? My guys were either M.I.A. or off in the ether taking a dirt nap. Bloodsoul snuck in some early hits, but Dizzy threw on a Nemesis Skullcap and kept on tankin’. Sarmoth came out to play, but Kagella and Broan double teamed the Voidy back to the nether. That’s when things really broke down for me. With the arena filled with my mates, Dizzy opened a portal to nothing and cast Invoke the Nether! I sat down and scratched my head – where did all the guys go? I managed to find their souls and bring them back – but Dizzy cast it again! Cheeky thing, she actually giggled (in that evil gnomish laugh) as she followed up with an Unstable Affliction, which I shrugged off until it was followed by some Fel Armor. I’m ashamed to say, I cried Uncle.

Third match, the tie-breaker. Ashi, Bloodsoul, Kagella and Broan were back from the Nether and ready for revenge. Dizzy was exhausted and my guys were fresh. It was over quickly.

Second Round: Keegana Silvershield

Another Alliance? Where were all the Hordies? No matter, we’d had a rest and were ready to go. I misjudged the dwarf, she was a stubborn one and refused to go down early. We fought for ages, Bloodsoul lead the way until Parvink and Kulvo Jadefist came out and stymied the attack. Frustrated, I Immolated Keegana, hoping to burn the concentration out of her. Things were close, but then Keegana put out the call for King Magni Bronzebeard! And HE ANSWERED! Who the heck gets their KING to fight for them? Wow … I think I fainted at that stage. Still, the pesky dwarf was still on fire, and I hadnt been hit much so things were looking tight. With victory in sight, I started to dance – then Keegana smiled a smile of pure evil and cast Lay on Hands (top decked)! I cried and conceded.

Second match. Never annoy an orc, we hold grudges. Kagella, Ashi and Bloodsoul charged as soon as they could and Broan brought the pain, inspiring Kagella to once more pummel Keegana. Poor dwarf didnt even have time to blink.

Third match, played out like the first. Korthas Greybeard plonked his shielding butt down and stubbornly refused to budge. I burnt the dwarf once more, but this time she put it out with a Sacred Purification. I was ready for the Lay on Hands this time and used the Eye of Kilrogg to deny the paladin access. Things were progressing nicely, I stood in the middle of the fray throwing around Shadow Bolts and Steal Essence, even managing to put of Magni for a while. That was, until a busy little monkey called A-Me 01 brought him back, along with the Greench. I thought he was a myth! Sourpuss stole my presents until I got rid of him, but the writing was already on the wall and it said “Forang is lazy loser”.

Round Three: Gorebelly

Ok, time for some Horde on Horde, Orc on Orc action. We clasped hands at the start of the match, and joked around about something to do with a gnome, a pint of milk, and a suitcase. Dont ask, I’ve forgotten the details. I think someone forgot to tell Gorebelly the fight was on, cause in the middle of battle he starting suiting up in armour, and what’s with the affiliation for knives? He’s an Orc – use an axe! Felstriker helped keep my guys back, and the Onslaught Girdle and Band of the Ranger-General helped ol’ Gore out, but Kags had already smelt blood.

Second time around, and Gorebelly was more prepared – but he’d already started taking his armour off (someone tell the orc that its not best of 1). Mebbe he thought he wouldnt need it. With the Onslaught Girdle, Stronghold Gauntlets, and Felstriker poor Voss and Bloodsould didnt stand a chance. Gorebelly took down Voss, and then with a Victory Rush demolished Bloodsoul. (Note to self: encourage team to mourn AFTER the fight, not during.) A Mortal Strike took out more of my guys, and Gorebelly charged whomever remained, throwing himself at them with pure orcish abandon. It would have been wonderful to see, had I not been busy trying to find some tricks to bring the match back into a balance. Then Rak Skyfury showed his puny mug, and that just goaded Gorebelly some more. In desperation, I sought out the future with the Eye of Kilrogg, and only discovered that Gorebelly was due to complete either a hunt for Sunken Treasure, or go down to Stranglethorn Vale and help out some Big Game Hunters. It seems the demonic powers had left me. Eventually, Gorebelly ran straight at my face and stabbed me lots of times. It hurt.

Third, third match in a row. Boy was I bushed. Voss came out several times and ignored the Victory Rushes to lay some early smack down. Kagella came for support, but was rushed out before doing any damage. Kagella eventually ran out of support, as Gorebelly was ignoring his flaming skin and running at her teammates. Towards the middle of the match things evened out and both Gorebelly and I were on our last legs. Completing the Big Game Hunter quest, I knew Gore was looking for a Wraith Scythe. He didnt find it, and that left me with a chance. I completed The Name of the Beast and was given access to a second Immolate, which I cast straight away! A second turn in, and I found a Shadow Bolt! Eventually Gorebelly succumbed to the smell of his own burning flesh, but not before dealing me some massive internal injuries.

We shook hands after the match, and went and got drunk together.

Round Four: Phadalus the Enlightened

Space elves? When did they crash their spaceship, and learn shamanism? I thought only us Orcs (and Trolls and Tauren) knew how to shaman. Man, I really have to keep up with the gossip. I liked Phad though, he was fun, and eager to fight. Still, he wasnt paying attention and Kagella, Thulthun and Broan ran at him screaming. Still, he brought out some shiny axes (Axe of the Legion, Wraith Scythe) and his Fire Elemental Totem caused some flaming trouble until I gave Thulthun some Warlock Training and dispelled it.

Second match started well for Phad, he had Kulvo and Brother Rhone to stand in front waving a red flag. Still, Rhone was drained of his life, and Kulvo fell also. Burning was added (once more) and things looked in my favour. Then things turned sour for Phad, he tried bringing out two axes, but fumbled them and ended up chopping off his hands. Dropping the Wraith Scythe, he conceded in the face of my aggression.

Wrapup

After the final battle I took the team out for some ale in Grom’gol, while we waited for the Zeppelin back to Orgrimmar. We toasted Kagella for leading the way in many of the fights, and three cheers for Broan for supporting her. Thulthun got a naga to chew on, and Bloodsoul and I got hammered and set fire to things. Doshura was a quiet achiever, helping out to protect my delicate face and speedily remove some annoying protectors. I think Bhenn had a good time, its hard to tell – but they seem to enjoy Voss’s company, so I’ll likely ask them back. Ashi was a good little soldier, and while he wasnt able to use his stealth, his fortune-telling helped smooth out some decisions. We played hard, either winning or losing a round in under 30mins (for the most part, Keegana and Gorebelly were plain stubborn). I’m glad I learnt Immolate at the last minute, as it made a world of difference, and I’m sure having Thulthun and some Warlock Training will be good against more beat heavy matchups.

I was proud of my team. We came 4th with a score of 3 wins and 1 loss, and we did it without using any rare items, spells or massive allies.

Laziest Peon #4 – Ramstein’s Lightning Bolts

Welcome back to the Laziest Peon – a series of articles where I compare a common or uncommon WoW TCG card to its WoW MMO equivalent.

This week I’m going to look at one of my favourite bits of kit – Ramstein’s Lightning Bolts. Initially, I was going to present Spell Reflection, but I realised partway through that that would have made four “s” articles in a row. Its funny how the mind works. Onto the gear!

Ramstein’s is a 3-cost trinket from the Through the Dark Portal expansion. Its a generic trinket that any class can use, and deals 1 point of nature damage to everything – well almost everything. It cannot hurt totems (totems can only be targetted as though an ally – they arent actually an ally). Its a very equitable, symmetric card – burn for all!

Its an impressive card, for 2-resources you can unleash the fury of nature (destroying the card in the process). Read the fine print though – it also deals damage to your side of the table. In some cases, that can hurt you more than your opponent – so you have to be careful when you use it. One place that Ramstein’s is a perfect match is against Onyxia. The lovable Dragon usually takes out your allies for you, so you wont really have much to accidentally fry on the friendly side. Wait though – didnt Onyxia just tap into The Whelp Pits, or summon the Brood of Onyxia? Usually that’s a very bad thing for the raiding Heroes – but if its turn 5 or later (which Stage 2 usually is) and you have this trinket, then YAY! Nighty-night Whelps! And there isnt a thing Onyxia can do!

MUAHAHAHAHAHA!

How come? Its equipment – Onyxia can counter an ability (Meaningless Exertion) but she cannot counter equipment coming into play. About the only thing she can do is hope you’re all tapped and Burninate. And like you’d be that silly. And even if she did somehow try to remove it, its instant speed! You can just blow it up in response.

I think the bolts have some use outside of Onyxia’s Lair though. Its not a bad card whenever you want to wipe away some weenies. It doesnt target, so it gets around the usually rush cards of Apprentice Teep and Apprentice Merry, even “Chipper” Ironbane gets the boot from the bolt. Trolls love this card – it basically reads “Pay 2, destroy -> Call all Trolls big sissies” – giving many +1 ATK (Ash’ergi, Blood Guard Mal’wani, etc) and revving the guts out of Warcaller Zin’bawa. Warriors love it too – going on a Killing Spree that wipes your opponent’s board (and yours if you are not careful). The Alliance can even extend the reach of the bolts to nab Latro Abiectus and Jeleane Nightbreeze – using Barnathrum, Lord of Pain.

There is a lot this little card can do in the right deck but how does it compare to the MMO trinket of the same name? The bolts drop from Ramstein the Gorger, and undead Abomination (think Plagueborn Meatwall, or Stitches) in the dungeon-city of Stratholme in the Eastern Plaguelands. Since patch 2.3 the text has been “Unique-Equipped. Use: Harness the power of lightning to strike down all enemies around you for 200 Nature damage. (5 Min Cooldown)” Prior to 2.3, it wasnt unique and didnt have a cooldown.

Mass damage? Check. Nature damage? Check. Destroyed in process? Nope. A card like Ramstein’s has to be destroyed from a game balance point of view. If it was useable each turn, that’s 2-points to everything for 2-resources, for ever! You’d only need 4 turns (2 for you, 2 for your opponent) for most allies to be wiped from the board, and it would make many abilities irrelevant (Holy Nova, Consecration). I think the version we see in Through the Dark Portal preceded patch 2.3, which is why its non-unique. Not that that really matters a lot, since its destroyed in the process. It does beg to ask the questions, are there any unique equipment in the TCG (the answer is no, but there are plenty of unique allies), and will be see any unique equipment in coming sets? Its hard to guess, but I dont think so. Unique is usually for especially nasty equipment, which in the WoW TCG is likely to result in epic and high cost – effectively making it unique to begin with.

Ok – so I waffled on a bit there, but you can see a neat example of translating a MMO trinket into a TCG card. Its a simple transisiton (when compared to say Shiv – from last time), but a powerful card in the right hands. Ramstein’s Lightning Bolts is one of those cards kooky deck builders love, but doesnt see a lot of competitive play.

I hope though, that you consider playing a couple in your raid decks, if you dont already.

Onyxia Raid

On Saturday just gone we had our final WoW TCG Raid of the year, and the end of a 3 month ladder. With all three Raid players winning, we had 3 players tied on highest points. But it was close, so very close.

Let me lay it out for you. We had an all Alliance Raid Group: Timmo Shadestep, Halavar, Kintara Wintermoon, Bildros Nullvoid and Kana Nassis. With an aggressive opening few moves, dropping allies left, right and centre we blasted through Stage 1 easily. Stage 2 was managed quite well, Onyxia could only manage to put 9 Whelps out and we traded those for health and allies. We managed health well, pulling out some nice Power Word: Shield (the best one was from a top-deck to keep the Priest alive one more turn!) and heals when required, and going into Stage 3 we still had all 5 of us all under 50% health. But the writing was on the wall – we just couldnt see it. With some massive draws, Onyxia threw down Draconic Rage (two more to add to one she had in Stage 1), Tooth and Claw, Trample, and dual Dragon Hide. The Priest was without Mass Dispel, so we were struggling. Halavar threw down some massive targets (Hellreaver, Two-Handed Weapon Specialization) and threatened to pound Onyxia. The rest of us put down some protectors and tried to prong the dragon into attacking. But a Burninate and Wrath of Onyxia, along with several Flame Breaths kept the board down. First the Priest went, and Onyxia entered into the final stages of her Raid timer (at 20 resources Onyxia wins). The Rogue was next (I guess all those poisons annoyed the Great Drake), and with 13 damage still to be done in 6 turns we looked in decent shape. But then the aggressive Hunter was eaten and the tide had turned. Bildros wasnt laying anything but breath-fodder, and Halavar had already gotten back 2 Hellreavers twice and was seriously running out of juice. It went down to the wire and in the end, the Alliance ran out of turns.

So close! Stage 3 is just harsh, with the sheer amount of cards that Onyxia can throw down a turn.

The Bildros and Halavar decks we exposed as flawed, and since I built them I’ll try to poke around and provide an analysis and possible improvements. I havent yet made a Raid deck that I was happy with, though I’m starting to come up with things that a deck does and doesnt need. I’ll make a separate post for that analysis.

Laziest Peon #1 – Serpent Sting

Welcome to the first of what I hope will be many weekly/fortnightly articles mashing together the WoW MMO and WoW TCG. The goal is to take a common or uncommon card from the TCG and look at how it fits the flavour of the source MMO. This week we’re starting with a class that is close to my heart – Hunters! Lets dig a little deeper into today’s card.

Serpent Sting is a 2-cost, instant marksmanship ability from the March of the Legion core set. Its cheap and fast – two things I love about an ability. It can sit on both Heroes and allies, making it nicely flexible. It suits any type of Hunter deck as it can do a default 1-point per turn of damage, or 2 if the Hero has a ranged weapon. Like many of the Damge-Over-Time cards coming out, it needs to be instant else it may be dispelled before it has a chance to even work (Deadly Poison, Corruption, etc) – the smart play is to leave 2-resources untapped and play it during your opponent’s End-Of-Turn phase.

One (or 2) damage doesnt seem like a lot, but its on par with the other DoT abilities in the game, so its consistent from that regard. Hunters do lose out when compared to Warlocks and Mages as they dont have access to other cards like Chromatic Cloak and Sapphiron Drape. And you may think that it could stack with Aspect of the Hawk, but that only applies to ranged damage, and Serpent Sting deals nature damage. However Alliance Hunters do have access to Tomadae the Magnificent, which could push through just enough damage for the win late in the game.

How you play it is up to you and your individual style of play. Against decks with little ability removal, play it early – even if you dont have a Ranged Weapon. Its resilient like that, if your bow is destroyed, the ability still stays in play to ping your opponent, then once you get out another ranged weapon it effectively recasts itself. One thing to watch out for though is for sneaky Scryers who can attack the abililty directly (Arcanist Avelena and Magistrix Tibrana for example). If DoT is part of your core strategy, it may be worth packing some Krenig Soulguards.

I think Serpent Sting could see play in Limited TCG environments – as access to removal to sporadic and doubtful and constant damage straight up annoys players and puts them on a timer they may not be able to handle. Even without a Ranged weapon, its still useful. I’m not sure on the Constructed environment – DoTs seem a little slow for me. Warlocks have a lot of them and Rogues have Deadly Brew – Hunters dont have access to card that can stack stings – so a card like Serpent Sting may be a late game play rather than an early one – breaking a stalemate rather than being a win condition.

So how does Serpent Sting compare to the MMO ability of the same name?

Stings the target, causing [$RAP*0.1+X] Nature damage over 15 seconds. Only one Sting per Hunter can be active on any one target.

Nature – check. DoT – check. Marksmanship – check. Instant – check. Looking good on the basics. RAP = Ranged Attack Power – this is nice, as the bonus damage the ability deals could be explained by having a higher RAP which is typically due to having a powerful ranged weapon. About the only point of difference is that in the MMO you can only have 1 sting active at a time. I think to apply that to the TCG would be too restrictive – its hard enough for DoT to work, and limiting the number of times it can be applied would hurt the long term viability of DoT. I dont think it affects the card for not having it, and only helps it see play.

So thats it for the first installment of Laziest Peon. Hope you got something out of it, if not – leave me some feedback and I’ll work on improving the articles.